Chapter 4 - The Best of me

Chapter 4 -The Best Of Me




I glared back at Mara, there was no way she would get the best of me. "I assure you, you are not wasting your time, you may continue your questions". Mara obliged and finished her questionnaire and then began her assessment. I failed. She tried to tell me it wasn't about passing or failing, but honestly if she had graded me, I would have received a big fat 'F' on my forehead.

I was out of breath in a minute and my heart rate sky rocketed in record time. " You did well Jon, you will be back in shape in no time at all.
Can I meet with you Wednesday? same time, or would you prefer someone else?".

I gave a slight roll of my eyes and addressed her question. " No I really do not want anyone else; I'm sorry, I haven't had to be social in a very long time. I promise.... the next time we meet the attitude will be gone, but how come it's over so soon? what about the work out I am suppose to have?"

"Mr Bon Jovi, you haven't exercised in years, the assessment today today is work out enough for you, we will start you off slow and build from there, trust me in time I am gonna have you working your ass off, and then you will be sorry you asked and complained" She laughed as she walked down the stairs to the front door.

Opening the door she turned to me. "I'm sorry we got off on the wrong foot, but I really do think we will work out together fine." " I think so too, but please call me Jon", I had to admit there was something about Mara that was awakening my senses,
"can I ask you a question?"
"sure, shoot" 
" have we ever met before? you look so familiar." Mara smiled, her eye's milky brown began to sparkle. "Not really."
"Not really what does that mean?"
"How about we discuss this another time, Mr Jovi... Jon, I really have to go, I have another client. See you on Wednesday."

Her answer not really, kept repeating over and over, what the hell did that mean, we either have met or we haven't, how hard a question was it?, I walked casually to the fridge intending on getting a beer and some potato chips, somehow I poured my self a glass of milk, and grabbed a peice of chicken my mom had left in the fridge for me. I could not help but sigh, why did my Mom always have to be right.

Taking my refreshments, for which I would normally of headed straight for the recliner; today I sat at the kitchen table. Mom came through the door just as I was finishing my lunch.

The look on her face was one of victory. "cool it Mom. You can wipe that smile off your face. nothings changed, I still do not wanna do a reunion tour."

"You will have to take that up with Paul your Manager and Richie, I however am happy to see a small smile on your beautiful face, I forgot how wonderful that was, but please son get rid of that awful beard, you are to handsome for that"

I know it was hard for my Mom, seeing her Son hurting, but sometimes me seeing through my hurt and depression at times was impossible too.

"I guess your right Mom, the beard will go, but in my own time eh, one step at a time, but Mom, thanks."

"thanks for what, sweetheart?"
"For sticking around, I guess, for believing in me, I really never meant to hurt you or dad, I'm sorry."

I had to turn away from her as I could not look into her eye's and see the raw pain and emotion that I had made her suffer for all these years.

"Jon, you have never disappointed me, or your dad, she turned me to look at her, forcing me to look into her eye's, bringing her hand to my chin she gently cupped my face, "Son your pain is my pain, all I want to do is to take your pain away and make everything better for you, I know that will not happen over night, and we do not expect miracles, as you say, one step at a time." she leant forward and kissed my forehead before moving to the other side of the kitchen and starting her own must do chores.

Awaking next morning, I could not believe that my good mood was still with me, I never would have dreamt that I would feel this good, given that my dreams had been about Dorothea and what I had done, rising from my bed, I walked over to the bedroom window and opened the drapes. The morning was bright with the sun shining across the lake, which happened to be east facing.

" Jon, come on Son, It's time to get up. I don't want you sleeping your day away."

" Mom?" of course she was living here wasn't she? I heard her footsteps climbing the stairs, and then the knock on the door, "Jon..." "Yes Mom, I'm awake and up"
"OK, your breakfast is downstairs, all ready for you, its an omelet and 2 slices of wholemeal toast, please get it while its hot." I snapped,

"Mom, I'm 38 years of age, I can make my own food, stop treating me like a child." immediately I felt a pang in my stomach, the last thing I wanted to do was disrespect my Mom., I turned and was about to apologise again when I saw her shoulders slump and she headed out of the door, then 90 seconds later the front door opened and then shut, Mom had left my house.
Would I ever learn?, It is like I've said before, sometimes its hard for me to see past my depression.

The doorbell rang,  interrupting my thoughts, walking down the stairs I went to open the door, expecting it to be my Mom, I thought she could have forgotten her key. the door bell rang again, my Mom would not keep ringing the bell so it had to be someone else.
I reached the door and opened it, it wasn't Mom, It was Mara. And I was in my boxers, no shirt, so my gut was hanging out for the perfectly toned Mara to see.

"Mara, I thought you were coming on Wednesday." My surprise was apparent on my pillow pressed face.
"It is Wednesday Jon. "Wednesday? shit, I had lost all concept of time. "I'm sorry, give me five, I'll go and get ready"
"That's fine I'll wait, I will meet you in the loft room."

As quick as lightening Mara flew up the stairs like an angel with wings. A sweet, Sunny brunette angel.  I was cursing myself, for having such feelings, but deep down inside my soul  something had started to smoulder.